COUPLES CONSIDERING DIVORCE | SERVING WESTMINSTER, CO
When One of You Wants to Stay & the Other Is Unsure
If nothing you've tried is working, get help.
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HSA / FSA ACCEPTED
EFT & GOTTMAN METHOD
You may be coming to therapy together, but you may not be coming for the same reason.
One of you may want to repair the marriage. The other may feel exhausted, emotionally detached, or uncertain whether anything can change. You may have tried marriage counseling before, only to end up in the same painful place.
Discernment counseling helps couples slow the decision down and understand how the marriage reached this point. It does not assume you will stay together, and it does not push you toward divorce. The purpose is to help both spouses find greater clarity and confidence about what should happen next.
If any of this sounds familiar?
You keep having the same fight different topic, same ending.
One of you pursues; the other shuts down or pulls away.
You feel lonely in your marriage, even when you're in the same room.
Small things turn into big fights, fast.
Trust has been broken — an affair, pornography, secrecy — and you don't know if it can come back.
The sex has faded, and talking about it feels impossible.
You're asking the hardest question: Is this marriage worth saving?
Known Counseling provides discernment counseling for Westminster-area couples at our nearby Thornton office and through online appointments throughout Colorado.
At Known Counseling, we use Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), one of the most researched and effective approaches to couples counseling.
Studies on EFT have found that:
About 7 out of 10 couples who complete EFT move from distressed to no longer distressed.
Around 9 out of 10 couples show meaningful improvement in their relationship satisfaction.
Most couples keep those gains one to two years later when they continue to practice what they learned.
Research on couples therapy in general also shows that partners who attend structured counseling improve much more than couples who wait and hope things change on their own.
Your marriage is not an experiment. We use methods that have been tested.
Three possible paths forward
Continue as things are for now
Make no immediate decision while recognizing that the current problems will likely remain unresolved.Move toward separation or divorce
Decide that ending the marriage is the direction you intend to pursue.Commit to a focused period of couples therapy
Take divorce off the table temporarily and commit to working seriously on the marriage, including personal changes from both spouses.
Find out where your relationship actually stands
Take our free Relationship Health Score. It only takes a few minutes, and it can save you months of guessing.
When discernment counseling may not be appropriate
Someone is being pressured or forced to participate.
A spouse only wants the counselor to convince the other person.
There is ongoing violence, intimidation, or a serious safety concern.
One person is using counseling to delay necessary legal decisions.
Either spouse needs immediate crisis or safety support.
Discernment counseling is also not legal advice, divorce mediation, or a substitute for consulting a qualified attorney.
COMMON QUESTIONS
Discernment Counseling FAQs
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No. The counselor’s role is not to pressure you toward reconciliation or divorce. The goal is to help both spouses understand what happened, consider the available paths, and make a more thoughtful decision.
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Discernment counseling is a short-term process lasting a maximum of five sessions. After each session, both spouses separately decide whether another meeting would be useful.
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Your spouse does not need to promise to save the marriage before beginning. Discernment counseling was specifically designed for situations where one spouse is leaning toward the marriage and the other is leaning away from it.
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We do not bill insurance directly. We accept HSA and FSA cards. We can give you a receipt (called a superbill) to send to your insurance. They may pay you back part of the cost
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Yes, if you want it to be. Faith can be part of your sessions if it matters to you. We don't require it, and we won't leave it out if it's a big part of your relationship.
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It depends on which counselors have open times that week. Most couples get an appointment fairly fast, especially if you're willing to see any of our counselors instead of waiting for one person.
Next Step
Schedule a no pressure, 15 minute phone consult.
We will listen, answer your questions and help you decide whether this is the right step for your relationship.
You have already been trying to fix this on your own. You do not have to keep doing it that way.
Serving Westminster couples honestly
Known Counseling does not have a physical Westminster office. We serve Westminster couples from our nearby Thornton office near 120th Avenue and I-25.
Secure online appointments are also available for couples located in Westminster and throughout Colorado.
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